Retribution for the blonde jokes..............

How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
===Both of them.

Why did the man cross the road?
===He heard the chicken was a slut.

Why don't women blink during foreplay?
===They don't have time.
 
Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
===They don't stop and ask for directions.
 
What do men and sperm have in common?
===They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.

How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
===He buys two cases of beer.

What is the difference between men and government bonds?
===The bonds mature.

Why are blonde jokes so short?
===So men can remember them.
 
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
===We don't know; it has never happened.
 
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
===They all already have boyfriends.
 
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
===A widow.

Why are married women heavier than single women?
===Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
===Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
 
What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
===They're married.